I am reading everyday on the various facebook groups I have joined for diep/breast cancer about women sharing their experiences about various operations they are going through. They call them ‘phases’ and they go from 1 being your first op until…well who knows… They are also talking about various interventions they have done to fix this, that and the other. It is all so complicated that at some point I stop and think that maybe it’s just me. Ok I want to get out of this asap and to look as decent as possible with as many interventions as possible, but it seems to be the thing right now to have various things fixed. It is there where I first heard the term ‘dog ears’. Seriously?! I had in my head an idea of what they could be talking about but honestly I went and googled it. So google almighty says… These are pointy ends of skin on the side of each hip, that remain after the abdomen is closed, during stage 1. These “Dog Ears” are removed at stage 2. This is the stage where you will be brought back to as near normal as we can get.
Stages again… So my dilemma really is, where does it all stop? You will never be the same of course but does it ever stop? Because as far as we women are concerned we never like our bodies and there is always something to adjust. It never stops! Yes you do everything to feel good in your own skin but you never do once you go down the ‘fixing’ route.
But here it’s different, I just want this ‘thing’ out and a decent breast in place and I’m done. Yes part of me would love to get back at the social security and get them pay for a few more plastic surgeries. Just for the stress their paperwork is causing me (feeling evil here).
Most women go through 3-4-5 maybe more ops in an year and this is alongside chemo or radio. Is this really necessary? You are beaten up by it all already to have to go through an op where you want them to move your nipple 1mm to the right because it is slightly out of place. We are not symmetrical to begin with and if some women would remember the days before breast cancer, they would remember that their breasts weren’t symmetrical like neither are their eyes or ears for example.
My main issue (in my head) right now is ‘will I wake up from it all’ not that the colour of my nipple doesn’t go with the colour of my sandals this summer. Do I start writing letters to everybody before going in? 
Always on a journey 